to blog or not to blog

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black-eyed-susanI went almost a year without blogging. In many ways, it was an experiment in privacy. I had become self-conscious about the idea that my own thoughts might be worth sharing, and hesitant about putting them out.

I wasn’t completely private. I can’t stop writing, so I took to writing more on facebook in long friends-only posts. There I encountered the problem that facebook is more a place people go to express themselves than a place where people are willing to put time and energy into reading slowly enough to comprehend what someone else is saying. I had a number of instances where friends misunderstanding what I wrote led to some unwanted drama.

To write or not to write, that is the question:
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of one’s own self-doubt
Or to take up the pen against a sea of thoughts
and by writing expose them.

Writing, even a relatively quiet blog, involves taking on a public persona of sorts. I don’t think it is of any coincidence that this past year, while I have withdrawn from blogging I withdrew as well from involvement in basically every group I have been involved in. I have been, as much as I can, quiet and withdrawn.

Yet I love to write, and the feeling that my own thoughts should not be shared was not a healthy one. It’s weird. People don’t need to share their thoughts. They don’t need to write a public record of their own ideas. Nor do people really need to expose their legs to public viewing, and yet the message to teenage girls that they should not expose their bodies to public viewing is unhealthy.

The fact is, I like to write, and I do better in my life when I’m writing more. So I’m going to try blogging again. I’m back.

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